


crazy love

by thunderylee



Category: KAT-TUN (Band)
Genre: Angst, Canon Universe, M/M, Mental telepathy, Rimming, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-09-11
Updated: 2011-09-11
Packaged: 2019-01-27 11:11:28
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,071
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12580480
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thunderylee/pseuds/thunderylee
Summary: It’s been almost two years since he’s had to endure that frantic tone, and he’s in no rush to hear it again.





	crazy love

**Author's Note:**

> reposted from agck.

_Oh my god, I’m late, I’m late, I have so much to do today, FUUUUUUUUUUUCK._

Jin twitches in his lunch meeting, darting his eyes around at the familiar voice like its owner had magically appeared in the conference room. His American manager eyes him oddly, but the executive is still talking and Jin jumps right in like nothing happened. He’s a little too enthusiastic for a five-second commercial spot for zit cream, but it distracts him from what he’d just heard in his head.

It’s been almost two years since he’s had to endure that frantic tone, and he’s in no rush to hear it again. Maybe he should stop eating Mexican food before bed.

*

The clock on the wall blinks 2:05, and it takes Kame a second to register that his electricity had gone out.

His mind races as he scrambles to find an accurate timepiece, cursing the early hour that is not actually early enough, and takes a quick shower before attempting to drive on no coffee. They’ll give him some at the studio if they want him to function at all. It’s his life fuel.

_Maybe I should stop eating Mexican food before bed_ , he thinks, and he starts to nod to himself before he realizes that he hasn’t eaten Mexican food in _years_. And the voice in his head doesn’t belong to him at all.

Kame swerves when he realizes to whom it _does_ belong, and seriously considers the possibility that he may be going crazy. Too much work and too little sleep for too long has finally made him crack, that lazy drawl taking over his mind as clear as day like that guy is right here in the car with him instead of five thousand miles away.

“Leave me alone, Akanishi,” he grumbles, tightening his hands on the steering wheel, and wonders if he could squeeze in a long overdue visit to his therapist. Maybe if he skips dinner.

*

Jin tries not to think very often. Thinking is overrated; so much mental exhaustion for nothing. He much prefers to feel his way through life, acting on impulse and doing what makes him happy.

Having that guy’s voice in his head does not make him happy. It makes him neurotic, stressed, his poor relaxed brain unaccustomed to the complicated inner workings of Kamenashi Kazuya. He’s had a headache for a week, nerve spasms that makes him look like he’s on drugs, and the only time he experiences peace is for a couple hours in the late morning, which is most likely when Kame pops an Ambien and takes his nightly nap.

Luckily, Jin has a decade of experience when it comes to ignoring Kame. It’s been awhile, but it doesn’t take long to get back into the swing of things, and life is much more pleasant once he quarantines Kame’s OCD into the furthest corner of his mind. Now it’s more like someone left the radio on a particularly annoying news channel, and Jin can tune in if he wishes.

Sometimes he does, when he’s particularly busy or feeling down about himself. It’s a nice reminder that there are people worse off than he is.

*

“Are you sure you… you know,” Maru says slowly, gesturing with his hands while Kame raises a sleepy eyebrow. “Are you sure you don’t have unresolved feelings for him?”

Kame can’t even get mad. His therapist had asked the same thing, and not for the first time. Also, he’s been awake for twenty-three hours, the past four of which have been spent filming a PV. Admitting to hearing Jin’s voice in his head is much less shameful when it’s discussed in two-minute increments.

“Something going on between you two?” Koki jokes as he catches them whispering behind some equipment, and Kame spitefully flings his leg across Maru’s lap and lays his head on Maru’s shoulder, giving Koki an “and what?” face.

Koki rolls his eyes and sneaks out for a smoke. Wistfully, Kame stares after him; he wishes he still had time to smoke.

“Not necessarily feelings of _love_ ,” Maru clarifies, like they’d never been interrupted. Kame doesn’t bother to move; it will look cute on the making of. “Just… unfinished business. Did you ever even say good-bye to him?”

“We don’t have to say those kinds of things to each other,” Kame says with a sigh. Jin’s thoughts aren’t what’s complicated – they’re quite simple, actually, like what he’s hungry for and good-looking girls, sometimes both at once – it’s _why_ they’re in his head in the first place that’s driving up Kame’s blood pressure. “I told him to leave, so he did. It would have been dumb if he stayed. This is old news, anyway. It’s been almost two years, but this is the first time something like this has happened.”

“Maybe you need to, like, do something to get him to leave,” Maru suggests. “Like an exorcism.”

Kame bursts out laughing, nearly falling off of his chair at the thought. “He’s not a _demon_ , Yuichi.”

“Who’s not a demon?” Taguchi asks, trotting up to them with a grin.

“Your mom,” Kame replies, smirking at Taguchi’s casual nod of understanding and smacking him in the ass on the way to his next set. His seventeenth wind must have kicked in.

*

There’s no reason to get up before noon today, but Jin can’t go back to sleep. Kame’s entirely too active for three-thirty in the morning Tokyo time, bringing his “reception” to the same level as garbage truck pickups or construction equipment.

He should probably talk to someone about this. It’s not healthy to hear your ex-whatever’s thoughts at all possible times. Jin doesn’t know how to define what Kame used to be to him; just that he’s not it anymore. They were inseparable as teenagers, then they worked closely together and became distant rivals at best, but they’ve always had an understanding. It was Kame who’d told Jin to chase his dreams and not to look back. And that’s exactly what Jin did.

“She said ‘never look back’, whatever you face~” he sings under his breath in amusement as he rolls out of bed. He’s in a rather good mood for being rudely woken up.

Kame’s genuine laughter, as rare as it was, always did make him smile.

*

Just when Kame can’t get any more freaked out, Uchi says the absolute worst possible thing he could ever say. He usually says dumb shit, but Kame hangs out with him anyway during his very rare free time. They’re friends or something. Their mutual love of dick is enough to make up for it.

“So since you can hear his thoughts, does that mean he can hear yours, too?” Uchi asks casually as he slurps on Kame’s noodles.

Kame feels the blood drain his face. “Oh, my god.”

“Have you talked to him about this?” Uchi goes on, oblivious to Kame’s horror. “I know _I_ wouldn’t want to hear your thoughts 24/7. It’d be like a never-ending string of obsessive compulsion and I’d probably kill myself.”

“Shut. Up,” Kame hisses through his teeth. “I am not that bad.”

Uchi raises an eyebrow, and Kame tries to clear his mind. It has to be possible without drugs. Instead he finds himself wondering if the jeans he wants to wear tomorrow are clean and whether he wiped up the coffee ring on the counter this morning and shit, is it a right or a left spin after the jump in their new song?

“I really don’t want to call him,” Kame says with a frown.

“Who said anything about calling?” Uchi says through his mouthful. “You don’t need to pick up a phone to talk to him, Kazu.”

Concentrating as hard as he can, Kame feels like an idiot as he tries to speak inside his own head. _Don’t kill yourself, Jin. We’ll figure this out._

He doesn’t get a response, sighing in exasperation until he sees the clock on his wall. It’s four o’clock in the morning in Los Angeles; Jin’s probably sleeping now. He’ll have to wait until later to try and talk to him telepathically.

“This is so fucked up,” he says out loud.

“I’ll say,” Uchi agrees, and Kame narrows his eyes at his very unhelpful friend. “I didn’t even think you liked him.”

“What are you talking about?” Kame demands.

Uchi sighs, like it’s completely obvious. “Clearly some part of you is gay-yearning for him. Or he for you, but being as you’re the one with experience in that department, I’d put my money on you.”

Kame’s too stunned to reply, just gaping at Uchi until he finishes his bowl and belches.

“Can I have seconds?”

*

Four beers, six shots, and some questionable smoking material later, Kame’s constant inner monologue has finally been subdued to a low rumble.

Jin’s also making out with a complete stranger, but it’s a small price to pay for peace. The voice in his head has been driving him crazy, trying to talk _to_ him and now Jin’s certain it must be a figment of his imagination. There’s no way Kame would be so insistent about reaching him through some ridiculous telepathic connection that doesn’t actually exist.

He’d tried to get a shrink appointment through his manager, but she’d just told him to hold tight until he’s been famous for awhile and his fans will admire him for getting help with his mental problems. Until then, he should cope like everyone else.

Coping seems to be working out for him as this unnamed girl drags him out to her car and throws him down in the backseat. He’s surprised he can even get it up with how trashed he is, but he definitely feels all his blood rush south and he moans when she doesn’t waste any time rolling a condom on him and going for a ride.

He loses himself to the sensations, his mind completely gone as she bounces up and down on him, and all he can think is how good it feels.

*

Kame prides himself on his willpower and acting skills. For years he’s just wanted to punch people in the face and say what he really thinks, but he always controls himself and smiles like he means it. It’s what he’s the best at, if he had to narrow it down.

However, Jin’s voice hissing dirty, raunchy things in his head is testing the limits of his restraint. Especially since he’s in the middle of filming KAT-TUN’s new TV show. He must have wavered a few times, because Maru gives him a couple weird looks and it takes every ounce of Kame’s focus to make it through the next hour.

It should disturb him that he knows the exact moment Jin comes, but he’s much more mortified by his reaction to it. While nothing shows on the outside, there’s a rush of heat that courses through him and he actually starts to feel turned on. Thankfully, Jin must pass out right after, because all senses of him completely disappear and Kame manages to regain his composure before anyone (else) notices.

“He was having sex,” Kame tells Maru later. “It was traumatizing.”

Awkwardly Maru pats him on the shoulder. “I think you should talk to him about this, Kazu.”

Kame smirks. What he’s going to do is get even.

*

Jin wakes up in a cold sweat, his eyes snapping open faster than his hungover brain can process as the voice in his head comes back full force.

And this time, Kame’s tone is much different. It’s one Jin’s never heard before; contrary to popular belief, nothing like this has _ever_ happened between them. Jin has nothing against gay people, but every bone in his body is completely straight – until now, it seems. At least, that’s the only explanation for Jin becoming completely aroused _while hungover_ before he’s even awake.

Kame’s thoughts are jumbled and rushed even during sex, but much more centrally focused. Jin can’t tell who Kame is with, just that it’s another guy, which is painfully obvious when Kame starts going down on him.

_It’s so small, ah well, at least it won’t hurt my jaw_.

Jin actually laughs out loud, which makes his headache worse. At least his crazy is entertaining him now. Until Kame goes on.

_I bet Jin would be bigger._

His next breath gets caught in his throat. He can’t be imagining this, he just can’t. His conscience cannot possibly hate him this much. But the only other option is that he’s actually hearing Kame’s real-time thoughts in his head, and while he’s no psychiatrist, he knows that mental telepathy is not real. If anything, he’s developing a second personality that’s just taking the form of Kame, whose goal in existence is clearly to torture him for the rest of his life.

_I wonder what he would taste like, what noises he would make. He has a beautiful voice._

His groan isn’t even intended. It’s a good thing he’s staying by himself, and that his crazy chose to strike when he happened to be alone. He doesn’t even want to think about what would have happened if he was out in public when thoughts of Kame _sucking him off_ infiltrated his mind. Being as he’s already got an erection, the end result couldn’t be very favorable.

And being as he’s already touching himself, he’s not bothering to search for any sense in this arrangement. On top of the explicit images, Kame’s _voice_ is low and husky, and Jin had never thought he’d be into that. Clearly he is, fingers wrapped around his cock and stroking with each timbre of Kame’s very masculine tone, and a chuckle escapes through his next moan at Kame’s relief when this guy finally gets off.

Jin thinks that giving head must take a lot of effort, and he freezes mid-squeeze when he hears _You have no idea._

“Kame?” he says out loud, carefully.

_Hi, Jin._

No fucking way.

_Yes, fucking way. You owe me one, asshole. I was on camera when you decided to take some skank for a ride. Payback’s a bitch._

Narrowing his eyes, Jin’s about to give him a good piece of his mind – literally – but then Kame’s thoughts are X-rated and vulgar and Jin’s hand flies up and down his cock as Kame clearly starts _fucking_ this guy. What turns him on isn’t just Kame’s voice, but how he’s comparing them, saying things like Jin would be tighter and louder and Jin comes with a sharp cry, followed by Kame’s orgasm that takes him higher like they were actually together.

_Oh, my god, you actually made me finish_ , Kame thinks, and even his mental voice is breathless. _What the fuck is going on, Jin?_

But Jin doesn’t answer. He’s already fallen back asleep.

*

Talking to Jin in his head isn’t much different than talking to him in person. He doesn’t get many responses, and when he does, they’re laden with bad attitude. It figures that Kame would be given mental telepathy powers with someone who doesn’t want them. At least with him.

They mostly experiment with different types of thoughts, refusing to acknowledge the more intimate ones. Jin can hear _everything_ that goes on in Kame’s head, even his confusion about Jin, which Jin conveniently ignores. However, since Jin _feels_ more than he thinks, Kame doesn’t get them at all. Kame doesn’t understand how someone can just not think. Of course his thoughts are going to overload the brain of someone who doesn’t even think on his own.

He’s not really surprised to see Jin on his doorstep at midnight, because he’d been unusually chatty all day. That is to say, he’d weighed in on Kame’s questioning thoughts, giving ridiculous answers to the unimportant ones and actually addressing the concerning ones. At one point Kame told him to mind his own business, and Jin’s laugh had him cracking up at the exact same moment Taguchi made a stupid pun. Which Jin found hilarious.

“I’m debuting _next weekend_ ,” Jin says now, and Kame hears nothing in his head. “We have got to stop this.”

Kame thinks about messing with him, acting like he knows nothing and watching him wonder if he really has gone crazy, but then Jin tilts his head and gives him a knowing look, and Kame smiles sheepishly. “I wasn’t really going to do it.”

“Liar,” Jin says, but he’s also smiling as he kicks off his shoes and walks past Kame. “I have a theory, but you’re not going to like it.”

“I don’t like having you in my head,” Kame counters. “Try me.”

“I don’t like having you in my head, either, you know,” Jin says, hands on his hips in a way that reminds Kame of when they were teenagers. It’s comforting, at least until Jin picks up on the thought and smirks at him. “I hear _everything_ , Kame. Even the shit you don’t want me to hear.”

“Don’t listen, then,” Kame says casually, but inwardly he’s freaking out. Jin has to sense it, he doesn’t know why he bothers trying to front, and finally he throws his hands in the air. “What do you want from me, Akanishi? A confession in blood? I’m not the only one who got off that night, you know. I’m sorry I’m not as mindless as you.”

“Please stop,” Jin says slowly, rubbing his temples. “I have two of your voices screaming at me, and neither makes sense. Look, I have a theory. I think that…”

_I think that something somewhere wants us to interact again._

Kame blinks. “It’s so weird to hear your voice and not see your lips move.”

_And that something is you._

“What,” Kame says flatly. “You’re crazy.”

“I am,” Jin agrees. “You made me crazy.”

And then Jin kisses him. Kame doesn’t see it coming, his mind pleasantly blank, at least until Jin’s mouth crashes against his and it’s like the past five years never happened. Kame’s mind is racing with everything this could possibly _mean_ , what they’re going to do now both in their careers and right here in Kame’s apartment.

_Stop thinking and fucking kiss me._

Kame grabs him by the collar and kisses him with every ounce of his being.

*

Jin starts to see the perks in hearing Kame’s thoughts the second they come together. He never knows how to touch other people – girls, at least until now – and they never tell him. Trial and error often results in annoyance or even complete disgust, the mood or not upheld because of something Jin did or didn’t do.

Kame tells him. His head is filled with nothing but directions, what Jin does that he likes and what Jin _should_ do that he will like, and Jin rushes to follow them all at once. Jin learns that Kame really likes it when Jin flicks his tongue against Kame’s just a little bit, teasingly, and after the first bump of Jin’s hardening groin against Kame’s hip, Kame wants to feel it more. Ordinarily the constant stream of instructions would be bothersome, but they’re given in that inexplicably sexy tone and Jin obliges without thought.

Things get real hot real fast to the point where Jin’s wondering if they’re going to do it right here in the entry way, until Kame chuckles into their kiss and the next thing Jin hears is _don’t you remember where my bedroom is?_ Before he fully comprehends it, Jin’s picking Kame up by the ass and blindly carrying him across the apartment, bumping into nearly everything as he miraculously finds Kame’s room and subsequently his bed.

They end up side by side, tugging at each other’s clothes and reaching boldly between each other’s legs, and Kame’s real moans sound a million times better than the ones he hears in his head. He arches when Jin twists his hand on his cock (which Kame had told him to do) and Jin just stares at him, enticed by the expanse of neck that he wants to lick. _Do it_ , Kame hisses, and Jin leans in, latching his mouth to Kame’s skin, and Kame adheres to Jin’s pleas to moan right into his ear.

It’s almost surreal. Jin feels a bit like he’s dreaming, except that what they’re doing is definitely happening and he can honestly say he’s never dreamed about Kame quite like this before. They should have done this the second they started hearing each other’s voices in their heads, Jin decides. Hell, they could have done this years ago. Jin didn’t even know he _liked_ guys – particularly Kame – until all this started, and that’s a hell of a lot of wasted time right there.

_I find it ironic that you only think in bed_ , Kame interrupts him, and Jin narrows his eyes behind closed lids until Kame goes on. _And I’m fine with you only being gay for me._

He would be. Jin remembers Kame’s questions during his last tryst, wonders if he’s going to answer them tonight, and the second the thought crosses his mind, he’s on his back with Kame tonguing his way down his chest.

“Oh god,” Jin gasps, echoing his thoughts that add _you don’t have to_.

“I want to,” Kame replies as he opens Jin’s pants and licks the head of his cock. Jin groans and doesn’t have to look down to see Kame’s smug eyes. _Stop thinking and fucking enjoy it._

Jin does exactly that. Kame’s mouth is amazing, in a completely different league than the girls who just bob up and down, and now he _really_ wishes they’d been doing this for years. Kame bathes his cock with his tongue, flicking it against the knot under the head where Jin really likes it and doesn’t stop until Jin thinks he’ll come right in Kame’s face if he keeps it up.

His fists clench the sheets and he doesn’t know that he wants to grab Kame’s hair until Kame tells him it’s okay – _be as rough as you want, I like it_ – and then both hands sink into the thick tresses as Jin’s hips start to cant on their own. It’s so good that he wants to slow down and savor it, but that’s one request Kame doesn’t grant as he moves even faster, pressing his tongue into the slit and resorting Jin to moans and trembling.

_Fuck, I’m gonna come_ , and Kame sucks him harder, drinking down every last drop and not letting go until the oversensitivity reaches Jin’s brain. Jin lays boneless on the bed, completely limp and sated and unconcerned about what comes next. Clearly Kame is not going to leave it at this.

_You’re right_ , Kame’s voice breaks through his orgasmic haze. _Just relax and trust me._

A few months ago, Jin wouldn’t have trusted Kame with a rock, but now he just spreads his legs at Kame’s prodding and only jumps a little when he feels cool air somewhere he didn’t know he wanted it before. Kame’s thoughts turn graphic again, how small the hole is and whether Jin will like it, and Jin can’t even be ashamed by his own mind screaming out in affirmation because then Kame’s _licking_ him there and Jin has no idea how he’s gone his entire life without this feeling.

_God, I love how your body reacts to me. Open up for me, Jin. Let me inside._

It’s almost like Jin’s muscles are listening to him, stretching from the quick flicks of Kame’s tongue with minimal contracting when a lubricated finger slips in alongside it. It feels a lot better than it should and Jin thinks they have their mental connection or whatever this is to thank for this, because Jin’s never done this before and probably _would_ never if not for Kame’s voice in his head coaxing him into it. And once that thought crosses over to Kame, his tone gets a little softer, sweeter even, and Jin’s body becomes even more welcoming.

_I’m glad for it, too_ , is all he says in Jin’s head, and it’s as good as a confession. Then Kame’s hand is on top of his, gently coaxing the sheets out of his clenched fingers, and it had to be a thoughtless action since Jin didn’t hear it coming. He squeezes Jin’s hand as he pushes another finger in, licking around them as he curves them up, and he doesn’t need to read Jin’s thoughts when a press to something deep inside him has him jerking and twisting on the bed.

_The fuck?!_ he barely gets out, internally, and Kame’s deep laughter vibrates his rim as he aims for that spot again. Jin gives up trying to understand it, just rides the sharp wave of pleasure as Kame keeps rubbing that spot that sends him out of his skin. _Kame – Kazu – fuck._

_You like that?_ Kame asks, his thoughts completely smug, and Jin thinks about saying no just to be a brat. Then Kame has three fingers inside him and Jin wants more, shamelessly pressing back against them, and he doesn’t bother to try to hold back his next thought.

_Fuck me, Kazuya, please,_ and Kame’s tongue leaves him, paving the way up Jin’s thigh and dropping to his stomach like he can’t separate it from Jin’s skin for even a second. He reluctantly lets go of Jin’s hand and Jin hears the crinkling of a condom wrapper, along with Kame’s sudden insecurity at taking this next step with Jin.

Jin doesn’t know what to say to him, out loud or inside his head, so he does the next best thing and grabs him by the hair, pulling him the rest of the way up and right into his mouth. It occurs to him too late where Kame’s tongue just was, but he can’t find it in himself to care when Kame fingers him harder and groans into their heated kiss as he lubes his sheathed length.

“Jin,” Kame says, almost a whimper, and Jin wraps his legs around Kame’s thin waist. His cock lines up with Jin’s opening and it just goes in, both of them gasping, and Jin’s knees hit his chest as Kame starts to move.

And the voices in his head finally disappear.

*

Kame has had a lot of sex in his life. Younger men, older men, women while he was still figuring things out, and with every single one, his brain never quite shut off. He was always concerned with his rhythm and stamina or the other person’s noises. Sometimes it was boring enough that he made mental lists of things to do afterward or recalled his lines for whatever he was working on at the time.

With Jin, he doesn’t have to think. He just feels, Jin all around him and beneath him, his responsive body that seems to fuck him back with each thrust. Jin’s hands on his shoulders, in his hair, sliding down to his ass to urge Kame deeper inside him, growling into their kiss that has become more of a meshing of tongues mid-coital.

“Harder,” Jin whispers, and Kame lets go of everything he’s ever known. He doesn’t even know how long they rock like this, it doesn’t matter, it feels good and Jin’s lifting his hips to meet every thrust and Kame loses track of reality. Every one of his nerves is focused on Jin and how he feels right now, escalated when Jin hardens again and Kame rushes to touch him.

The noise he makes is beautiful, just like Kame knew it would be, and his own groans mix in with Jin’s in their own intimate harmony as they near the inevitable end. Jin becomes impossibly tight around him, jerking as his cock twitches and erupts in Kame’s hand, and Kame can’t stop himself from following. The sharp waves of pleasure crash over him, leaving him tingling from his scalp to his toes, and all he can do is roll mostly off of Jin and snap off the condom while Jin stretches his legs with a low, satisfied groan.

It takes a few minutes of (comfortable) silence before Kame notices what’s missing. _Can you still hear me like this?_ he tries.

Jin turns to flop on top of him, completely asleep, and Kame just shakes his head as he brushes Jin’s damp hair out of his eyes.

*

Kame’s gone when Jin wakes up, but there’s a note and a spare key on his pillow.

_Stay as long as you’d like. I’ll be home late._

Jin translates this into “please help yourself to whatever you need” and takes a shower before raiding Kame’s fridge. He makes it until he’s flipping through the cable stations, starting in on his second sandwich when he realizes that his head has been silent all day.

_Kazuya? You okay?_

It’s a little unnerving, especially after hearing him ramble for so long. The lack of noise seems so heavy. He doesn’t have a Japanese phone anymore, and Kame has no reason to have a land line; he makes it an hour before imagining all of the possible reasons why Kame wouldn’t be thinking, _all_ of them unfavorable and making him run for the train station before his brain catches up with him.

He’s pretty sure some of the other commuters recognize him and he doesn’t care, offering obligatory apologies as he weaves his way through the thick crowds of people on the street. He’s also never run so fast in his life, all those years of smoking catching up with him as he nearly doubles over in front of Johnny’s building, falling through the door and giving the security guard quite a shock.

Everyone looks surprised to see him – naturally, since he’s supposed to be in America _debuting_ – and a few of them try to talk to him, but he just keeps going. He’ll explain later; right now, he has to get to Kame. He has to know that he’s okay. You don’t just hear someone’s voice in your head for months and suddenly not anymore. Assuming it was normal to hear it in the first place.

He could find his way to KAT-TUN’s office blindfolded, but when he gets there, it’s empty. He walks around and looks in the corners, like they’d be hiding from him or something, and barely manages to stop himself from kicking a chair.

“Doesn’t anyone work around here?” he grumbles, then jumps at the hand on his shoulder.

“Jin.” It’s Maru, whom Jin’s never been so glad to see before now. “What are you doing here? I didn’t even know you were in town.”

“Where’s Kazuya,” Jin demands, still breathless, and Maru’s eyes widen. “Did something happen to him?”

“What? No. Jin…” Maru sighs, like he always used to when Jin would get overexcited about something and he needed a moment to catch up. “Kazu is fine. We’re in the studio today. I just came back to get Koki’s lyrics notebook.”

“He always forgets it,” Jin says, smiling in relief as Maru walks to Koki’s area and retrieves the leather-bound item. “Are you sure Kazuya is okay? I don’t hear… I mean, I just had a bad feeling.”

Maru stares at him, visibly swallowing as he presumably tries to put his words together. “You don’t hear him in your head anymore.”

“You know about that?” Jin asks, then nods to himself. “Of course you would. He told you, right?”

“It was real…” Maru says slowly. “I thought he was losing his mind, but you two really can hear each other’s thoughts.”

“Could, past tense,” Kame corrects, and Jin spins around to see him standing in the doorway.

Jin waves, feeling like an idiot as he sees with his own eyes that Kame’s alive and breathing and obviously still thinking. He concentrates so hard on sending a message that his eyes close, and when he opens them, Kame’s giving him a regretful look.

“Seems like it’s broken,” Kame says. “Our mental link. You should be happy, right? No more of my OCD interrupting your life.”

More than anything, Jin wishes he could hear Kame’s thoughts now. He wants to know why Kame’s being so cold to him, if it’s just for Maru’s benefit, or if he’s trying to pretend like nothing happened between them last night. “Kazuya,” is all he says, “I thought you were dead.”

Kame starts to laugh, then notices the serious expression on Jin’s face and falls silent. “I’m fine.”

“I see that,” Jin says, trying to keep from frowning. “I’ll just go, then.”

He turns to leave, brushing past Kame and making it to the door before he’s halted by Kame’s voice. “Jin.”

“What.”

“Yuichi, you may want to leave now,” Kame says, and Maru practically trips over himself to get away from the thick tension in this room. After he’s gone, Kame closes the door behind him and Jin feels those piercing eyes on him. “What _else_ do you want from me?”

“What are you talking about?” Jin asks, trying not to raise his voice. “Weren’t we just, you know, _together_ last night?”

“Yes, I remember,” Kame says crisply. “I suppose it was bound to happen sooner or later. Since it worked out in our favor, let’s just chalk it up to yet another good time between us and go our separate ways. Again.”

“I don’t want to,” Jin says stubbornly, and Kame looks at him in disbelief. “You think I just let you do that to get your voice out of my head? Why are you being such a dick?”

“Because you need a reality check,” Kame hisses, his eyes hard. “Do you think we can just skip off into the sunset all happy and gay simply because we had sex? It doesn’t work like that, Akanishi. You’re in America and I’m in Japan. We both have our careers. If it wasn’t for that goddamn mental link, we would still not be speaking. What on _earth_ could possibly make you think this could work?”

“You’re so cynical,” Jin shoots back, holding his stance. “You never take any chances. You’re the one who isn’t being honest with himself, Kazuya. I shouldn’t have to read your mind to know that you miss me.”

“I don’t miss you, you arrogant-”

“Bullshit,” Jin calls, and the truth shines on Kame’s face as his mouth falls shut. “I’m not going to stand here and say things like ‘I love you’ because I don’t, not yet. But last night, I felt like I could, a little bit, and I’m not willing to let that go just because you’re too chicken shit to take a risk.”

“You’re crazy,” Kame says, clasping his hands to his face as he turns around a few times, and Jin doesn’t have to hear his thoughts to know that he’s freaking out right now. “You’re _fucking insane_.”

“You made me this way,” Jin replies, staring hard at Kame, who pauses and meets his eyes. “We’re both crazy, Kazuya, that’s why this is going to work. And it’s going to be awesome.”

Kame’s breathing so hard that his chest is heaving, looking like he wants to punch Jin in the face, but instead his fist grabs for Jin’s collar and he crushes their mouths together.

_Maybe we’re falling in the crazy love_ , Jin thinks, and Kame laughs into their kiss.

*

It’s recurring, their mental link. Kame learns this the hard way.

“What are you even-” Jin starts as he opens the door to his hotel room in Vancouver and gets cut off when he’s shoved up against the wall.

He stops trying to talk when Kame kisses him hard, slamming the door shut with one hand while pulling off Jin’s clothes with the other. This time they don’t make it out of the entry way, Kame turning him around and taking him right against the wall, and the bathtub is much closer than the bed.

“It only lasts three months, apparently,” Jin says, still breathless as they sink into the warm, bubbly water. “I hardly heard your voice, though. Must have been too busy on my tour.”

Kame sighs and stretches, letting the spa jets hit his aching body, and his head unintentionally falls on Jin’s shoulder. He’s exhausted enough to leave it there. “Few things are more torturous than listening to you _sing_ in my head every day.”

Jin’s chuckle vibrates Kame’s face. “I love you, too.”


End file.
